Two Contrasting Pics of Israel

Slow summer blogging. Hopefully I'll get back into the swing of things, as my kids return to Kindergarden.

Here as some pics of different aspects of Israel:

The top sticker reads "Modest Girls Prevent Disasters". Which leads us directly to the next pic:

"Your wife is 50? Throw away the old hag, and get a young russian!

Easiest Way to Support Mostly Kosher

I use Dropbox for everything. Literally. However I'm running out of space. If you don't have Dropbox yet, please install it using the following link: http://db.tt/jTGkfpk and help me get some more space!

What is Dropbox?

Are You Kidding Me? Rabbis Still Supporting Rav Elon

Ynet reports that Rav Druckman has invited Rav Elon to continue teaching in his Yeshiva (Or Etzion). Yes, Rav Elon - now a convicted sex offender - is still teaching crowds. The always interesting (if not always right) Tomer Perisco points out that if Rav Elon would have SMS on Shabbat or claimed homosexuality wasn't forbidden he would have been chased out of the Yeshiva...but sex offender? meh.

Blooper of the Day

Martin Dempsey = US General.
Partick Dempsey = Actor who plays McDreamy from Grey's Anatomy.

Is Ynet sure it got this distinction down?

Via: 7eye

The Three Pronged Sadness of Rav Elon

Rav Elon's sad story can be divided into three acts:

First: His actual crimes, and the suffering he caused his students.

Second: He couldn't accept exile. His ego just wouldn't allow him to remain in anonymity.

Third: Even after all this time and even after he was convicted, he still can't admit to having done anything wrong.

Old Joke, Still Worth a Post

There is a well-known joke about Talmudic interpretation. A Jew is talking to his Rabbi.
Rabbi," the man said, "Explain the Talmud to me."
"Very well," he said. "First, I will ask you a question. If two men climb up a chimney and one comes out dirty, and one comes out clean, which one washes himself?"
"The dirty one," answers the man.
"No. They look at each other and the dirty man thinks he is clean and the clean man thinks he is dirty, therefore, the clean man washes himself."
"Now, another question:
If two men climb up a chimney and one comes out dirty, and one comes out clean, which one washes himself?"
The man smiles and says, "You just told me, Rabbi. The man who is clean washes himself because he thinks he is dirty."
"No," says the Rabbi. "If they each look at themselves, the clean man knows he doesn't have to wash himself, so the dirty man washes himself."
"Now, one more question.
If two men climb up a chimney and one comes out dirty, and one comes out clean, which one washes himself?"
"I don't know, Rabbi. Depending on your point of view, it could be either one."
Again the Rabbi says, "No. If two men climb up a chimney, how could one man remain clean? They both are dirty, and they both wash themselves."
The confused man said, "Rabbi, you asked me the same question three times and you gave me three different answers. Is this some kind of a joke?"
"This is not a joke, my son. This is Talmud."

Rav Aviner's 2000 Year Screwup

I didn't actually see the question in this week's Shabbat pamphlets but suppsedly Rav Aviner was asked the following question via SMS:

Q: Why are there more Haredi talmidi hahamim (impressive torah scholars) than Religious Zionists ones?

So what would you guess would be his answer? an outright denial? perhpas praising haredi commitment to torah, while stating the cost of their culture? stressing how many torah giants Religious Zionism has?
none of the above.

His actual answer:

A: Because Haredi talmidi hahachamim started 2000 years ago and Religious Zioninst only started 100 years ago. However, their number and quality has been rising steadily. 

I don't even know where to start on that answer. ignoring the factual question whether or not the assumption that there are more Haredi talmidi hachamim is true, the most serious critque of his answer is that it reveals Rav Aviner's  view that Religious Zionism is a break from the supposedly unbroken chain of torah learning. This is a serious problem for anyone who wishes to be a true Religious Zionist. The flip side is a weird acceptance that the Haredi world is somehow an unbroken chain of torah continuity. If Rav Aviner truely believes that Haredim are the true (or at least) only embodiment of 2000 years of torah leaning (why 2000?) one fails to understand how he can be Zionist.

Israel Being Sued Over Jesus...Again..

From the Jerusalem Post:

A Kenyan lawyer has filed a petition with the International Court of Justice (ICJ) in The Hague, suggesting that the trial and crucifixion of Jesus Christ was unlawful, and The State of Israel among others should be held responsible, Kenyan news outlet the Nairobian reported on Friday.

Dola Indidis, a lawyer and former spokesman of the Kenyan Judiciary is reportedly attempting to sue Tiberius (Emperor of Rome 42 BC-37AD), Pontius Pilate, a selection of Jewish elders, King Herod, the Republic of Italy and the State of Israel.

"Evidence today is on record in the bible, and you cannot discredit the bible," Indidis told Kenyan Citizen News.

Oh well then..

Yes, those he suggests should have been convicted during the original trial have not been alive for more than 2000 years, however Indidis insists that the government for whom they acted can and should still be held responsible.
“I filed the case because it’s my duty to uphold the dignity of Jesus and I have gone to the ICJ to seek justice for the man from Nazareth,” Indidid told the Nairobian. “His selective and malicious prosecution violated his human rights through judicial misconduct, abuse of office bias and prejudice.”
Indidis apparently named the states of Italy and Israel in the lawsuit because upon the attainment of independence, the two states incorporated the laws of the Roman Empire, those in force at the time of the Crucifixion. 

We did? I really should ask for my money back from Bar-Ilan Law School. However suing Israel for the death of Jesus isn't even an original idea. Haim Cohen, former Israeli Supreme Court Justice recalls:

During 1948, not long after the establishment of the Supreme Court, I then still the State Prosecutor, was called to Moshe Smoira, our first president [of the court], and he showed me some files, filled to the rim, with petitions for the Supreme Court to have a retrial for Jesus the Christian (ישו הנוצרי). The petitioners were protestant reverends from various countries, all arguing that now, with the establishment of the Supreme Court in a Jewish state, our first duty was to correct the mistake of our immediate predecessor, the Sanhedrin, 1900 years ago. The president informed me that he had discussed the matter with the the other Justices, and they -obviously- decided that they don't have the authority to hear these petitions....He also asked me to respond in his name to the petitioners and explain why we didn't feel we had the jurisdiction.(Haim Cohn, A Personal Introduction, pg 305)

Joke of the Day

Spotted on Facebook:

A guy is walking along the beach in Tel Aviv when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand. He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub.

A genie appears and tells him he has been granted one wish.

The guy thinks for a moment and says, "I want to live forever."

"Sorry," said the genie, "I'm not allowed to grant eternal life."

"OK, then, I want to die after the Israelis and Palestinians make peace.

"You crafty little bastard," said the genie.